I believe we call that in the business, “locked in the box” and by business I mean the medical field in which I don’t work but do dabble as a patient from time to time and what you are experiencing definitely parallels what a surgery patient goes through when everyone believes they are unconscious, and it appears that they are, except to the person who can feel every excruciating detail. While you may not be fully aware of the pocket rockets you snap folded twice in a row in the jackpot sit n go of your life, you feel it don’t you?
I have been there and my only advice to you is what only advice there could possibly be to give, but i do so poetically in attempt to amuse you, never to unethically tempt, belittle, or abuse you: Don’t get locked in a box without first protecting your jock. For there is no greater pain than that which is delivered to you in vain, those shouldn’t be ashamed but who can help what ego that has not yet been tamed. But torture exists for sure in a bright room in which I’ve been twice, never less secure. Nevertheless be aware as those that inflict it upon me now have their sights set on you. They dance and stare, afterall theres no chance you will cause a commotion, until an evil voice cancels that notion right then and there, the doctor commands the torture to begin there. So it begins after you just felt the blade of a scalpel slicing through your ribs like they were made of pineapple, that talk you hear is heard through shock and fear, is that the shy foreign nurse you stop to hear? It is and she just made a mockery of your jockery, as her comrades cry and drink beer, Christ even the med students are here. Well its too much for any man to bare, and no one should be stuck like that there.
Safe travels are made on roads with gravel, and pokers best played without jackpots and wheels that spin, for these games are rigged in a way here that ensures no one ever wins, like rolling a ball down a lane with no pins, after the balls returned you just plan to roll it again? Try a sit n go in which you can split with 2 other young bros. That’s the path I took, but it’s not for everyone, you must know.